Matters of the Heart

A great deal of my time has been spent on accommodation. While caring for the needs of others should be one of our focuses in life, we must be careful not to neglect our own desires. In the hustle and bustle of meeting deadlines and running errands, years have come and gone, and I’ve been forced to deal with reality. Ideally, I would like to continue to make others happy, but the reality of the matter as God spoke it to me is that, "I am come that ye might have life, and have it more abundantly." Far too much of my attention has been spent on the big audiences, my friends, my co-workers, and my family. Until recently, I have not been able to focus much of my attention on what I want and desire in life. While interviewing for another job position, I was asked, "When are you going to do what Travestine likes and desires?" It was an excellent question for which I had no answer.

Last week I attended a Women of Faith conference, and Man!! do those sisters have game. As I listened to one speaker with a lifestyle similar to my own, I began to reflect on some similar concerns. While I am fulfilled in my earthly existence attending to big audiences, I am becoming more concerned about a smaller audience, GOD, my audience of one. I must embrace the freedom he sacrificed his son for me to enjoy.

My son has gone off to college, and my daughter is the only child at home. She is a very motivated and independent young woman, which gives me more time to talk and commune with God through reading and constant prayer. My recent decision will not meet with the approval of everyone, but it is my time to move on, to leave the cocoon of accommodation and complacency, and join the masses of lifestyle changers. We, as a people, resist change. I am realizing more and more that change is productive, and as I have assumed the leadership role in times past, I must lace up my slippers of change and run the race that is set before me, looking only to Jesus who is the author of change.

I am never alone; this is the reality in which I have assurance.

The fear of the unknown has been the primary reason for my complacency, but to win the war on fear is to not accept failure. I Can Not and I Will Not fail. This is the attitude of the believer. With God on our side, we are victorious. Knowing that God alone is my source has propelled me to move forward. It’s true that there will be some earthly tests, patience, endurance, perseverance, but I can do all things through Christ who has given me the courage to make this step.

While we allow ourselves to accept the ordinary, God longs to broaden our horizons. He wants to surpass the usual and take us to the extraordinary. Friends, this what abundance means. Christ did not sacrifice his life for a paycheck-to-paycheck existence. Wealth is not just for millionaires. If anyone is deserving of it, it should those who have sold out to Him. I love the song, "I Surrender All." Yes, "All to thee, my blessed Savior, I Surrender All."

My prayer and supplication has gone before God, and I am confident that my happiness is his desire. This decision was not entered into unadvisedly, but reverently, and in the fear of God. "The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord and he delights in his way." Joshua 1:8 declares, "God’s Word should not depart from my mouth, but I must meditate on it day and night, that I might observe to do the things that are written therein: For then shall I prosper and have good success."

Those who understand the blessings of God will encourage me to move forward. I had one person to ask me, "Why are you leaving a good place?" My reply was, "Well I like to think that my presence is largely the reason for the place being great, and wherever my feet trod, will become great places as well for my having been there." As I close, peace is my desire for all of God’s creation.

By Travestine J. Wright