Love Don't Act Like That

Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, 1 Corinthians 13:4

We can talk all day about what love is and make every possible effort to show love to others, but when the bible speaks of love (charity), it is talking about transformation. It is impossible, or at best extremely difficult, to consistently walk in love unless something supernatural takes place in our heart. When change takes place in our heart, it produces different behavior.

Be patient therefore brethren, until the coming of the Lord. Behold, the husbandman waiteth for the precious fruit of the earth, and has long patience for it, until it gets the early and latter rain James 5:7

Farming is very hard work. The days start early and end late; and between that time there is plowing, planting, weeding and fertilizing. Each seasons begins with endless acres of dirt and nothing to show for it.

So the farmer does all he knows to do, and then he waits on God. In fact he has long patience, which means he waits on God and doesn’t move. He simply leaves it in God’s hand. Soon the hard work pays off with a great harvest, and through the patience of one farmer, thousands of people are fed.

Patience is waiting. Love deals with how we wait. It is our attitude as we wait. You see, we express our inward condition with our words and body motions. It is possible to simply persevere out of plain old stubbornness. But if out attitude is wrong, it’s not patience. Therefore we act in a way that’s not love.

Patience means contentment, peace, and a willingness to trust God. It means we say, "Lord stay on your timetable, I’ve left it alone." When a wife trusts God to change her husband, she doesn’t get frustrated when it seems like he will never change. Instead of nagging him, beating him with the bible, calling him devil and otherwise taking over God’s job, she will silently pray and worship God.

That means that she is trusting God, and that trust is seen in her actions. "I have faith that God can meet my needs, therefore I will walk in peace". "The circumstances on my job are not ideal, but I will wait and not lose my joy". "Even though I’ve told my children hundreds of times to clean their room and empty the garbage, I will not raise my voice when I ground them".

Kindness is something that everyone understands. In the medical profession, the most frequently reported virtue that patients remember is the kindness of the staff. Kindness is how we pass on in actions how we feel.

Kindness literally means, "I am not going to be burdensome to you, I’m going to be useful; I’m going to help."

If my wife is running late for the program, instead of pacing the floor, I will ask, "How can I help you?" People notice it when we help them. The multitude noticed Jesus because He was so helpful to them. He was very kind.

We all have read the account of the Good Samaritan (see Luke 10: 33-35). It is the story about a traveler who was ambushed, robbed, severely assaulted and left for dead. Two church men passed by him. They both witnessed his injuries, but neither did anything to help him.

Then a Samaritan (of all people) passed on the same road. "But a certain Samaritan, as he journeyed, came where he was: and when he saw him, he had compassion on him, And went to him, and bound up his wounds, pouring in oil and wine, and set him on his own beast, and brought him to an inn, and took care of him Luke 10:34. It was obvious that the man needed help. But even more obvious is the person who showed him kindness. In this case, love acts like a Samaritan

Wrath killeth the foolish man, and envy slayeth the silly one Job 5:2. Solomon said that envy was far more dangerous than anger and wrath (See Proverbs 27:4).

Envy chokes the life out of love. When envy enters a relationship, that relationship is going to die.

An envious person desires to have what he does not have. And when he can’t get it one way, he will try another and another. If he has to fight, he will fight. If he has to cheat, he will cheat. He will not hesitate to destroy. His mindset is simple, "I will possess; I will control; I don’t trust nobody but myself."

My wife and I learned about envy the hard way. We spent years in the midst of envious church folks, and it wasn’t a pretty sight. I learned from professionals how to be envious in the Name of Jesus. We sought to be "more anointed, more gifted and more holy" than anyone else.

Eventually I came to understand that the life of God was leaving. My relationship with God was faltering because I did not trust Him with my life. When there is no trust in a relationship, it suffers. We cannot love someone we don’t trust.

I was saying, "God, I don’t trust you. I am singing your songs but I don’t trust you. I am teaching and preaching your Word but I don’t trust you. I have a good testimony, but I don’t trust. I run and shout and speak in tongues but I don’t trust you."

Eventually God delivered me. I am not worried about what I have or don’t have. I don’t concern myself about who is more anointed than I am. I trust God to bless me as He desires when He desires. I appreciate my job even though it may not be as glamorous as I would like. I appreciate my ministry even though the support and resources are not what I want them to be. I am thankful for my wife and children and I don’t want anybody else’s. I am free walk in love.

If we are grateful to God for His countless blessings and eternal grace, we will be content with such things as we have. Then we will be able to walk in love. Look not every man on his own things, but also on the things of others Philippians 2:4. Impatience, unkindness and envy are not an expression of the love of God.

Love is how God wants us to live and respond. It is our choice how we act, so let’s show others what love acts like.

By: Edmund Brown