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Identity
Our identity defines who we really are, or does it? As I ask the question, "How many of you know who you really are and what your purpose is", I wonder how many will answer honestly and objectively. In answering this question the apostle Paul said it best, "When I was a child, I spoke, understood, and thought as a child. But when I became a man, I put away childish things. For now we see through a mirror dimly, but then face-to-face. Right now, I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known." I Corinthians 13:11-12 (paraphrased) In the phrase, "When I became a man," apostle Paul defines someone who "has endured the rigorous process of redirection. "Armed with no manuals, a few teachers and a boat load of critics, these individuals have set out to find who they really are." Like Jacob, they have wrestled with doubt, fear, and insecurity. Those individuals who are aware of their identity are as much in touch with their failures as well as their successes. They know fear as well as triumph. In summary, these people know that accepting themselves is just as important, if not more, than improving themselves. Far too often, people try to change who they are to fit in, or to look good in the eyes of others. They order the best wine, purchase the finest car, live in the largest home, and go through rigorous training to look their best. They have not reached that "face-to-face" level Paul spoke of. Becoming a man (knowing who you really are) is not achieved in the bedroom or the boardroom. It is achieved as one author puts it, " by having an inner dialogue with yourself; by plumbing the depths of your beliefs, hopes and fears. In order to reach maturity, one must get to know themselves at an intimate level that is not for external approval or the perceptions of others." We must be able to look inside ourselves and accept the man (or woman) we really are. The man who makes excuses for his failures has not "become a man." A key step to knowing who we truly are is accepting that we make mistakes. We must accept falling down sometimes. One must be capable of falling down without staying down. A real man (woman) learns from his mistakes and uses them as a means of improvement. Understanding our identity requires an open mind. We cannot have any preconceived ideas nor should we sell ourselves short because we don’t possess the same capabilities as someone else. Moses struggled in this area. When asked by God to go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt he replied, "Who am I, that I should go to Pharaoh"? God said, "I will surely be with you: and this shall be the sign to you that I have sent you…" Exodus 3:11-12. People, what we think about ourselves are of no consequence to the Lord of all the world. He could care less what we think about ourselves. Many people, and I must say believers also; spend far too much time worrying about appearances. The enemy is robbing us in this area. In order to reach the level of full maturity, we must be ready to accept who we are: stripped of our titles, bank accounts, trophies, awards and accomplishments. We must start, as Michael Jackson would say, " by looking at the man in the mirror." We must ask him to change his ways. For no message could be any clearer. If we care anything about making this world a better place, we must take a look at ourselves (for who we really are) and be willing to change." The man in the mirror Jackson refers to, is the "real you" naked and unabashed. It is the procrastinator, the unorganized, the critical, overprotective and self-indulgent being. Accepting our liabilities (faults, shortcomings) is a positive step to becoming the person God desires. We were born in sin, and in iniquity our mothers conceived us. We have fallen short of the glory. These are not idle words; they are the facts, which describe us all. Accepting that we have fallen short is not meant to be an insult nor an embarrassment; it is a vital step to discovering our identity and finding our purpose in life. The story of the Prodigal son is not just about a rich young man who wasted his life’s earning on material things. It is about a man who found out who he really was, and acted on it. This process did not take a day or a week, but the scriptures declare, "When he came to himself, he arose and did some soul-searching. Until this young man found himself, he had to settle with being a wanderer, accepting a life with the scum of the earth. The point the author is trying to make is that we don’t have to settle for crumbs, but we will until we do as this young man did. Until we " began to be in want," we won’t take any action. We, too, must be stripped of our possessions in order to find our true selves. Some of us will wander in the deserts and valleys never discovering the real man who is out there waiting to be discovered. Another key point the author of this passage makes is that whenever we discover "our true self," our Father will be waiting. You better believe that he will kill the fattest calf and celebrate. Why, because He knows the importance of one his children knowing who they are and to whom they belong. One final point to remember as we explore our identity is that we are not defined by who our parents are or were. We are not held accountable for their sins. "The fathers have eaten sour grapes, and the children teeth are set on edge. As I live, says the Lord, you shall no longer use this proverb in Israel." Ezekiel 18:2-3. It may be difficult for many to accept, but God affirms that the harmful consequences of our parents’ actions do not have to be perpetuated in our lives. To gain insight into who we are requires a visit to the throne. We must ask our Heavenly Father for direction and be willing to search the scriptures, as we look deep within ourselves for the knowledge of who He is and how we are to identify with Him. By Travestine J. Wright |