Daddy, Do Something
Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of
his old age: and he made him a coat of many colors. And when his brethren saw
that their father loved him more than all his brethren, they hated him, and
could not speak peaceably unto him Genesis 37: 3-4
In our world today, it is difficult to find truly "godly" people. Most
individuals (I’m speaking from my experience) that I am in contact with
are deceptive, selfish, hot-tempered, bad attitude, and always seem to have a
hidden agenda. Authentic forgiveness is so rare, one must wonder whether
churches preach it anymore.
The bible is a record of the lives of many individuals, and no matter how
many disregarded God’s holy standard, there was always someone who kept the
faith. Before we throw up our hands and give up, we need to pick up our bible
and study the lives of people who held on.
Joseph is a good example of one such person. His life is unforgettable. You
say, "But I’ve been unfairly mistreated". His own brothers unfairly mistreated
Joseph. The very people that you would expect to provide Joseph with comfort and
affirmation, were the very ones who abused, lied on and rejected him. Throughout
the whole ordeal, he never became bitter, cruel or resentful. When he had the
perfect opportunity to get even, it was never even a consideration.
To be quite honest, everyone should meet Joseph. You see, God doesn’t just
give us an abstract command to forgive, but he gives us Joseph. The treatment
rendered to him by his brothers was inexcusable, yet Joseph forgave them for
every hour of his youth that was lost.
God uses the lives of people in the bible to teach us, train us, encourage
us, and even warn us. If we consider King David, we will see that God is
merciful and will forgive the most horrific crime. But not only will your sins
find you out, but the things you do in the present can mess up your future
forever.
Through the prophet Jonah we see that you cannot run away from God’s calling.
Through Paul we see that God can take the most feared sinner and make them the
greatest of saints. Peter shows us that even though we may deny Him over and
over and over again, He will still come back and find us.
When we study the bible, we not only read truth, but we see it revealed in
the lives of ordinary people like you and me. That’s what I need to see;
everyday life people who struggle in the faith, get angry and cry
sometimes. I need to see people that are tempted to give up, and every now and
then, question God about the hard times.
Whatsoever things were written aforetime was written for our learning, that
we through patience and comfort of the scripture might have hope Romans
15:4. "Aforetime" means all the truth recorded in the Old Testament. It was
written generations ago, but we have it for our learning in 2003. I’m learning,
you’re learning, the teacher and preacher are learning. No matter how anointed
we think we are, we’re still learning. We need to know the truth about God and
the truth about life so that we will be able to persevere in the future.
In our scripture we find that Joseph was the son of an aging father. And
because he was the son of his "old age", he loved him more than all his other
sons. In fact, his preference of Joseph was so bold and obvious, it made the
rest of the guys feel worthless. What’s so great about having a son in old age
is beyond me. I guess it made Israel feel "macho". But I believe it is more
important to be in touch with what’s going on in your home than to feel "macho".
It wasn’t enough that he had all these sons by all these different women
living in his home, but he is only being a parent to one of them. If we bring a
child into this world, we are supposed to be a daddy to that child all his life.
If we bring ten sons, we need to be a daddy to all ten of them. You say, "But I
work and feed them". Yes, but they aren’t cattle. They are children; your
children. And God expects you to do something with them.
The government gives free food to millions of children. But they are not a
daddy to any of them. During times of war, many refugees are misplaced by the
circumstances. Our government sends food to those people. But they are not a
daddy to them.
Joseph’s family had major problems, and it was all Jacob’s (Israel) fault.
Men can put their children in a position of failure because they won’t stand up
and manage their home. When Jacob got ready to return to Canaan, he should have
just left. He should have gone to Laban, and told Laban, "I quit, and I’m
leaving". But instead, he slipped away. What was the message to his children?
No matter how much we talk, our kids are looking at how we handle things.
They can see and they are not deceived. You may be one thing at church and
another thing at home, but you aren’t fooling anybody. Somebody is watching you
all the time.
While they were on their journey, Jacob’s daughter (Dinah) was raped. Do you
know what Jacob did? He didn’t do anything. Two of his sons tricked the men of
that village and murdered every one of them, robbed them and took their women
and children away. When he found out, all he said was "the people of the land
won’t like me anymore".
When our kids are acting up, we should stop them. If kids are living in our
home, they owe us respect and honor by willingly submitting to our rules. If we
don’t command respect from our children, they will run over us.
Jacob’s oldest son was Reuben. One day Reuben got so bold that he decided to
have sex with Bilhah, one of his father’s concubines and the mother of two of
his brothers (see Genesis 35: 21-22). When Jacob found out, do you know what he
did? He didn’t do anything.
Men should be aware of the environment in which they rearing their children.
It is up to us to stop the anger, rebellion, deception, rivalry, and out of
control jealousy that exist on our homes.
Joseph was Jacob’s favorite son from birth. Rachel was his mother, and she
was Jacob’s love from the very beginning. Joseph was different from his
brothers. He had a different character and a different attitude. He was easier
to raise, so rather than fuss with the others, it was easy to just get Joseph to
do it. Passive dads are like that, but it’s wrong. Every child should be made
accountable to his own responsibility.
Now Israel’s sons weren’t ignorant or blind. They could see that Joseph and
his mother were preferred over them and their mother, and they didn’t like it.
He spent lots of time with Joseph and no time with them. And kids want time with
parents more than anything else. He gave Joseph an expensive coat. It wasn’t his
intention, but he told all his other sons, "I value Joseph more than you." And
they heard the message clearly.
At first they were just a little jealous, but as the years went by, it turned
into resentment and hostility. Eventually, they decided to kill him. You would
be astonished to learn of the problems that exist in some families. At this
point, Jacob’s family was out of control. And the main problem was that Jacob
didn’t do anything about nothing.
One day Jacob sent Joseph to check on his other sons (see Genesis 37:13). All
the while the sons were planning on killing Joseph, and Jacob didn’t have a
clue. He was actually sending Joseph into a death trap and didn’t know it.
That’s so incredible; the same family has a child so loved by the father and so
hated by the brothers.
It is dangerous to be a passive parent. It’s dangerous to not discipline your
children or make them accountable. If they do wrong, we should punish them. We
should send them to their room; take away their music, computer and keys. We
should tell them their errors. It is up to us to keep our family together.
According to public school teachers, the top discipline problems in 1940 were
talking, chewing gum, running in hall, cutting in line and littering. In 1990,
it is drug and alcohol abuse, suicide, pregnancy, rape, robbery and assault. It
is easy to understand this when we see what has happened to the family; the
illegitimate birth rate is up 40%, the divorce rate is doubled and suicide and
STD rate among teens is sky high. Domestic violence is a big problem with four
million women beaten by their men. And a child spends hours a day in front of a
television and five minutes with dad (if he’s lucky).
Dad, we need to do something. We can never underestimate the example we set
before our children. We need to be available and know what is going on with our
kids. Being a dad is a tremendous job, but with God’s help, we can succeed.
By: Edmund Brown