They Are His Children ….Too

The challenge that I have had to face the past 20 years, and one that I am facing today is the reality that my children are not mine alone. Sounds confusing? It did to me also until I gained more insight. Our children do not just have earthly parents who are responsible for their well being. They also have a heavenly Father who is as concerned about them as we are.

I believe that parents who find themselves frustrated by their children’s actions will find some needed relief when they stop trying to fix what seems to be wrong with their children. Just as we have no control over our destinies without the aid of our Heavenly Father, we lack control over their lives as well. The Bible only instructs us to train them in the ways of God. After we have accomplished what we were instructed to do as parents, the rest is left up to God. The key, here, is to do all that we are instructed to do.

During my childhood, spiritual truths were not imparted to me. I did not grow up with the knowledge that I exercised control over my destiny through the power of positive thinking and impartation. I did not realize that by my words I would be justified (if those words were positive in nature), and by those same words I would be condemned (if those words were negative in nature). I was accustomed to hearing that money belonged to the rich people and that I should be content with what I had. Well guess what, I didn’t have anything. How could I be content with not having the proper resources to care for my family? Why is it that I had to accept that riches were only for a "SELECT" few and prosperity was not meant for everyone?

I was told by some of the religious folk that "godliness with contentment is great gain," but it was never explained to me what being Godly encompassed. I was not taught that there is a Biblical way to be successful according to the writer of Joshua. According to Joshua 1:8, "if we meditate on the words of God and observe to do the things that are written therein, we will not only prosper, but we will have good success."

As parents /adults, we are instructed to "train up a child in the way they should go and when he is old he will not depart from it." Proverbs 22:6. I have seen too many good people raise kids that have gone wrong. So in whom does the problem originate? Are we training our children in the way they should go or the way we would like for them to go? The word "train" means to dedicate, narrow, or set aside. The dedication expressed here, is a focus on and commitment to God. The word "way," does not refer to personality or stage of life, but rather to the "proper way."

Therefore, parents are to teach their off springs to walk in the way that is Biblically correct. In doing so, we are guaranteed success. There us no Biblical support that my children will be successful if they become what I think they should be, but the scripture gives me assurance that they will be successful if they walk in the way of the Lord.

Just as a tree "follows the bent of its early years, so it is with our children. If we teach them to love this world, to crave its fashions and follies in childhood, they are almost certain to live for the world when they come to mature years.

On the other hand, if we properly instruct them as to the vanity of all that men of this present age live for, from the beginning, they are in little danger of reversing that judgment as they grow older. As parents, we must remember that it is not enough to tell our little ones about Jesus and how he rejected the Devil and the things of this world, we MUST see to it that in our own lives, we exemplify what we are instructing them to do. As the parent of a teenager and young adult, I have seen and heard it all too often how parents say one thing and do another. For us to speak of our true devotion to Christ while still manifesting the spirit of the world in our dress, home, and in the company we keep, our little ones will readily put down whatever we are instructing them to do.

It is not enough to say to them, " Do what I say and not what I do" anymore. In today’s world, according to Trav, "if you ain’t doing nothing then don’t be saying nothing cause they ain’t hearing nothing you say."

Children today are very controversial, and not at all like children of yesteryears. When I was growing up, talking to parents (talking back was unheard of) was done with extreme caution. Back then, a twelve year old was afraid of grown-ups. In today’s society, older men are afraid to walk by a group of twelve year olds for fear of their lives. One can only ask themselves, what went wrong? Part of the problem I can assure you has to do with the manner in which these children were reared. When we obey the words of the Lord, we benefit, just as the prophets of old benefited.

It took some time for me to realize that God is true to his Word. If he says it, the matter is settled. If things are not happening like he said, you can call him on it. "Father, your Word said for me to train this young man/woman and I have done that etc." Shortly thereafter, you will begin to see some changes. Now I am not saying that we won’t have to endure some things and that everything will change. That assumption would be unrealistic. We must endure our trials, as would any believer. But the continual day in-day out madness that some parents endure will have to be dealt with at the hands of a loving Father. He longs for his children (that includes you) to be at peace. This gives me the hope and strength I need to keep going.

I hear parents say a great deal of the time that they don’t understand why children don’t do what they are told. Well, the last part of Proverbs 22:6 says that, "when he is old, not in terms of yeas, but when they mature and discover the truth of God’s Word for themselves and not by our constant nagging, they will not depart from it. God’s Word is true and sure. We need only to believe in it.

When I truly think about kids not doing what they have been instructed to do, I realize that if I am worrying and getting stressed by their seemingly disregard for parental concern, I realize that we, parents are not much different when we don’t obey our Father who commands us to "Be anxious for nothing."

Just as we don’t always heed the Call of our Heavenly Father, our children are not always eager to follow our instructions. If instructing them seems to be a daily command, which is going nowhere, my suggestion to you is seek His aid. After all, they are His children too. They were fearfully and wonderfully made. God has to remind parents that they are responsible for their children’s welfare, but He is Lord over their lives. God allows controversy to come so that everyone is aware of his or her purpose and to remain in his or her respective places. Some of the trouble we endure is not at the hands of Satan, but God getting the attention of his older (parent) and younger (kid) children. The Lord gives us free will to make our decisions about right and wrong. We, too, must allow our children some space, and consult the Father through prayer and supplication when things are out of control. After all, they are his children too!!!!!!

Travestine J. Wright